The Pleasure Pioneers
What is Vaginismus?
"Vaginismus is the term used to describe recurrent or persistent involuntary tightening of muscles around the vagina whenever penetration is attempted."
The symptoms include burning or stinging pain upon penetration, as well as intense fear or loss of desire when penetration is attempted.
How does it develop? It is a complex psychosomatic condition, and the causes can be varied, such as painful first intercourse, sexual abuse, fear of pregnancy, or a deeply rooted belief that sex is wrong.
Vaginismus isn't "only" about sex, it's about life. Penetrative sex is not the only thing its victims lose - let's be honest, not all of us prioritize that - but a sense of intimacy or self-worth too. It can painfully interfere with regular gynecological examinations, the use of tampons and period cups, or even childbirth. And if you have no one to talk to and share your experiences, the isolation can be unbearable.Let's fight the stigmas around vaginal sexual health and open up the conversation together
Resources
All things helpful from reading to therapeutic tools and toys. Please be advised that our approach to healing Vaginismus is very sex-positive and as such, this section contains is NSFW parts.
The Vaginismus Network
Break the isolation: Make friends and attend events
A community for people with Vaginismus. Having suffered in silence for many years, the VN team understands how communication, information and understanding can be a great comfort and help in managing and overcoming this condition.
Becoming Orgasmic Pleasure Course
For Women & Vulva-Owners Who Want to Learn More About Their Potential For Pleasure
- Knowledge is power - getting to know yourself
- Builds sexual confidence solo and with a partner
- Improves understanding of self-pleasuring
- Discover different ways to experience pleasure
- Learn how to have orgasms
Sh! Soft Silicone Dilating Kit with Bullet Vibe
Created to help you advance towards pain-free penetration
The kit consists of four soft and smooth silicone shafts of graded sizes, plus a vibrating bullet. Following and aiding therapeutic work, together with appropriate exercises, the Sh! Dilating Kit will help you transition to pain-free penetration.
YES VM
Vaginal Moisturizer
- Organic Gel to supplement natural lubrication
- Hypoallergenic
- Alleviates vaginal dryness and atrophy
- Free from parabens, hormones & glycerine
- PH-balanced ISO-topic formula
Lube & Vibrators
Vibrating sex toys, or vibrators, are wonderful tools for helping to relax tense nerve-endings, and can make 'dilating' a lot more pleasurable.
Vibrators needn’t be big to be effective; even teeny-tiny finger-tip vibes can be both useful and fun.
Go slow, and always add a generous amount of a lubricant you like the feel of. We recommend water-based lubricants as they are more body friendly. Opting for a paraben-free version lessens the risk of you developing irritation, so always look at the ingredients before making a purchase. Sh! Pure Lube is an excellent choice as it is body-friendly and hypoallergenic.
Choosing a more viscous lube can often be helpful as the thicker liquid creates a soft, padded layer between fingers/toys and vulva or vagina. Sh! Pure Plus Lube is waterbased, paraben-free and viscous.
Feelz Toys Finger Tip Vibrator
Gentle Fingertip Vibes for Exploring All Erogenous Zones
- Two tiny fingertip vibrators encased in soft silicone
- One red + one bright green vibe in each box
- Single-speed bullets powered by 2 x Micro Cell batteries (LR-41)
- Suitable for newbies
- Gentle vibration
Silicone Finger Vibrator
Sensual Finger Toy
- Slip-on finger vibe delivers discreet, easy-to-control tingles
- Soft silicone cover with gentle ribs for sensual stimulation
- Shaped to deliver both pin-point and broader thrills
- Waterproof for fun times in the shower
- Removable single-speed bullet
Dory Finger Vibrator
Finger Vibrator with 9 Powerful Modes
- Silicone finger vibrator delivers powerful thrills
- Perfect for exploring around clitoris, labia and vagina opening
- Comfortably wide silicone band to slide finger through
- Waterproof for bath-time play and ease of cleaning
- USB rechargeable
Mini Ribbed Vibrator
Ribbed Vibrator with Extra-Small Tip
- Smooth silicone vibrator with flexible tip
- Ribbed shaft with teeny-tiny tip
- 7 pleasure modes + 3 powerful speeds to discover
- Waterproof for relaxing play in bath or shower
- Battery-operated
Crystal Chic Vibrator
Slim & Firm Vibrator with 3 Speeds
- Slinky bullet vibrator in black
- Smooth satin finish silicone
- Genuine crystal adornment
- 3 speeds with up to 14 hours of battery life
- 100% Waterproof, body-safe and phthalate-free
Slender Mini G-spot Vibe
Slim Vibrator for G-spot Exploration
- Slimline vibrator with G-spot seeking tip
- 3 speeds + 7 pleasure patterns to enjoy
- Smooth silicone shaft and tip
- Waterproof for relaxing play in bath or shower
- Battery-operated
Cora G-spot Vibrator
Longer Handle for Ease of Use
- Slender vibrator with angled G-spot-seeking tip
- Made from smooth silicone
- Strong vibrations with 5 settings and 10 speeds
- USB rechargeable and waterproof
- 1-year guarantee
Cora Slim Rabbit Vibrator
Slim & Super-Flexible Dual Stimulator
- The longVery slim rabbit vibe: 4.5 inch x 1 inch diameter at widest
- Silicone sex toy, free from phthalates and latex
- Long shaft makes it easier to hold and reach
- 10 modes + 5 speeds to explore and enjoy
- Waterproof and USB rechargeable
Ana Slim G-spot Vibrator
Exceptionally Flexible & Soft G-spot Vibrator
- Covered in seamless silicone
- Super-bendy vibe for comfortable exploration
- Waterproof for fun times in the bath or shower
- 9 pleasure modes to enjoy
- USB rechargeable
Super Flexible Vibe with Remote Control
Bendable Sex Toy
- Soft silicone vibrator with flexible spine
- Made from body-safe silicone
- Curves to suit your natural shape
- 9-speed dual motors with multiple functions
- 1inch wide x 8 inch long
Ribbed Tapered Vibrator
Non-Threatening Vibrator
- Smaller size sex toy
- Made from body-safe silicone
- Soft, ribbed texture
- Slim tip tapers out
- 10 modes
Discretion Mini Ribbed Vibe
Finger-Size Vibrator
- Shorter vibrator
- 4.45 inch long x 0.83 inch wide
- Firm material
- Quiet vibrations
- Single, medium-strength speed
Rocks-Off Rainbow Prism Vibrator
Rainbow Prism Vibrator
- Long vibe with a tapered tip
- 10 pleasure modes
- Plastic material
- 100% waterproof
- Slim 0.75 Inch diameter with 4.5 inch of insertable length
Callie Silicone Bullet
Finger-Length Vibrator for Shallow Exploration
- Short vibe with tapered tip
- Powerful vibrations
- Matte black silicone
- USB rechargeable
- 3 speeds + 7 patterns to explore
Hand-Poured Sh! Cupid Silicone Dildos
Various Sizes
- Handmade Cupid dildos
- Body-safe silicone
- Available in vibrating versions
- Easy to clean
- Other colours available
Hand-Poured Sh! Wirly Silicone Dildos
Various Sizes
- Handmade Wirly dildos
- Body-safe silicone
- Available in vibrating versions
- Easy to clean
- Other colours avaliable
Sex Toy Cleaner
Spritz On, Rinse Off!
- Spritz on sex toy cleaner
- Vegan, all-natural with 97% organic ingredient
- Antibacterial
- Detergent-free
- Spray, wipe and rinse!
Therapists
Choose a professional who understands your condition!
Sarah Berry
Sex & Relationship Therapist
Having sought therapy for my own sexual difficulties, I have an understanding about how difficult sex and relationship problems can be and how they can impact your life.
Kate Moyle
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I believe in helping people to get to a place where they feel in control
of their bodies again; working towards sexual wellbeing, health and
happiness.
www.katemoyle.co.uk | www.thethoughthouse.co.uk
John O'Reilley
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I am qualified with a British Association for Sexual & Relationship Therapy and have been working in this area since 2002. I have assisted many women and couples struggling with vaginismus.
Karen Pollock
LGBTQ Councellor
I am a registered member of the BACP, working towards COSRT accreditation and specialising in LGBTQ issuess. I offer empathetic, non judgemental open-minded counselling in Northumberland
www.counsellinginnorthumberland.com
Northumberlandcounselling@gmail.com
Krystal Woodbridge
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I am a member of COSRT and a qualified nurse working in St Albans. I am a registered therapist with Pink Therapy and a former winner of the COSRT post-graduate award for work in psychosexual therapy.
www.woodbridgetherapy.co.uk
krystal@woodbridgetherapy.co.uk
Trudy Hannington
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I am a Psychosexual Therapist at the Leger Clinic, in Doncaster, and Chair of The College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists, as well a member of the British Association of Sexual and Relationship Therapy.
www.legerclinic.co.uk/
appointment@legerclinic.co.uk
Clare Staunton
Sex and Relationship Councellor
I'll work holistically to help you gain a sexual identity where pleasure and consent are at its heart - reducing anxiety around intimacy.
I'm based in West London, contact details below if you'd like to get in touch.
www.sexualhealinguk.com/
sexualhealinguk@hotmail.com
Mike Lousada
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I have been practicing as a Psychosexual Somatic® Practitioner in different forms for most of my adult life. My psychotherapeutic influences come from many different schools, and is currently working in London.
www.mikelousada.com/
info@mikelousada.com
Carolyn Cowan
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I am Carolyn Cowan, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist who is also a sex addiction therapist & a member of COSRT & ATSAC. You can make appointments to see me in Belgravia, central or south London. I can also work via Skype or FaceTime.
www.sexhelp.org.uk
Kirstie McEwan
Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist
I have then undertaken further specialist training with Pink Therapy to work with sexual and gender diversity.I am registered with the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) and I am also a general member of COSRT, currently working toward accreditation.
www.counsellingwithconfidence.co.uk
Dr Su Yap
Clinical Psychologist and Psycho-sexologist (ESSM/EFS certified)
I work as a Principal Clinical Psychologist in a NHS sexual health clinic, and am an active member of the British Society of Sexual Medicine. I run a successful private practice with individuals and couples I take a holistic view of the person, looking at biological, psychological & social factors that cause sexual problems. I use psychological techniques that scientific research has shown to be effective for sexual problems.
http://mindsurgerylondon.co.uk/
Rima Hawkins
Relationship and Psychosexual Therapist
I am a professionally qualified COSRT accredited, BACP registered therapist with over 20 years of sexual health experience. I have a private practice in Chelsea and Fulham. My main interests are female clients with psychosexual issues and clients who have inter/cross cultural relationship issues. My primary mode of working is Humanistic-Integrative Psychotherapy.
http://www.rimahawkins.com/
Can't find what you're looking for?
Visit the College of Sex and Relationship Therapist's website for a full list of COSRT therapists in your area. COSRT accreditation is awarded to psychosexual therapists who have met strict criteria in training, experience, knowledge, ethical standards, clinical skills and commitment to continuous professional development; this is audited annually.
